<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>The Toddler Years by Teacup_pirate</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22896298">The Toddler Years</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Teacup_pirate/pseuds/Teacup_pirate'>Teacup_pirate</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Ineffable Parents [8]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman &amp; Terry Pratchett</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Day At The Beach, F/F, F/M, Family Fluff, Fluff, Ineffable Husbands (Good Omens), Ineffable Wives (Good Omens), Kid Fic, M/M, Other, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Raising the anti-christ, Temper Tantrums, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, ineffable parents</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-02-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 12:00:20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>6,540</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22896298</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Teacup_pirate/pseuds/Teacup_pirate</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Raising a toddler is not an easy task, even when you're celestial and/or occult.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Ineffable Parents [8]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1574878</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>48</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Beach Trip</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>It’s Aziraphale’s day off, and the angel wants to take a family trip to the beach. Adam has a blast exploring and playing.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Adam was doing his best to help wipe down the counter from his step stool in the kitchen. Since he had conquered walking and balance, Aziraphale felt comfortable with letting their toddler help with simple tasks in the kitchen. Crowley came down the stairs to witness Adam making dramatic circles with a wet sponge and sticking his tongue out in concentration. Adam huffed after a moment as he tried to reach further back on the counter than he could comfortably reach. Aziraphale beamed a fond smile and picked Adam up so he could reach. With the sponge deposited in the clean sink, Aziraphale put Adam down on the floor and steered him towards the adjoining dining room. Adam walked over to Crowley, who was waiting at the high chair, and the toddler was again lifted into the air but not with the same grace and strength.</p><p>“Good morning Adam. Were you helping your Papa with breakfast?” Crowley cooed as he strapped Adam into the piece of furniture and put the tray table in place. </p><p>Adam banged on the tray table in response, happy smile plastered on his face. Crowley ruffled Adam’s hair before he turned his attention to helping Aziraphale bring breakfast in from the kitchen. Adam’s menu for the morning was a scrambled egg, a dollop of plain yogurt, half of a buttered and warmed English muffin, a few slices of apple, and water to start the daily hydration routine. Crowley’s breakfast consisted of two eggs, the other half of Adam’s English muffin and copious amounts of coffee. Aziraphale also had two eggs, a whole toasted English muffin, the rest of the yogurt cup, the other slices of apple, and his second cup of tea for the morning. </p><p>Adam played with his breakfast, but at least today he was determined to eat most of it. He playfully stabbed at his eggs, liking the sound of the plastic spoon clacking against the tray table and watched intently as the eggs wiggled in response. Adam was still conquering his spoon technique, so about half of the yogurt mostly went on his face while the other half was smeared in with the egg. When Adam decided he was finished with his spoon, he held it out to Aziraphale who always sat closest to Adam during meal times. Aziraphale saw the motion out of the corner of his vision and turned slightly to look at Adam.</p><p>“Word?” Aziraphale prompted as he put his own utensils down.</p><p>Adam scrunched his nose as he concentrated on his outstretched hand. “Spoon.”</p><p>“Yes. That is your spoon. What do you want?”</p><p>“Papa take,” Adam said, but when Aziraphale did not move he added, “please.”</p><p>“Splendid dearest,” Aziraphale praised as he took the spoon from Adam’s hand and placed it on the edge of his plate on the table.</p><p>Adam clapped and turned his attention to tearing his English muffin to shreds since the butter had made it soft, and he started to smear it in the egg and yogurt mixture on his tray. With both hands free, Adam started to eat the scattered scrambled eggs by the fistful, holding a bit of bread in anticipation in the other hand. As he started to fill up, Adam eyed his apple slices. He had helped wash them, and he was not about to let his hard work go wasted.</p><p>“Any special plans today Angel?” Crowley asked as he wrapped both of his hands around his coffee mug to absorb the warmth. </p><p>“I was hoping we could take a family trip to the coast,” Aziraphale suggested.</p><p>Crowley sipped his coffee and nodded in agreement. Aziraphale gave an excited wiggle as he continued to eat his breakfast. This was going to be Adam’s first beach trip, and both parents were eager to make more memories with their quickly growing toddler. </p><p>Crowley and Adam, who both were still in pajamas, left the dining room to get ready while Aziraphale cleaned up breakfast and packed a picnic for their trip. Adam was developing a sense of style, so choosing clothes for the day had become a long process. </p><p>But first, Crowley had to clean Adam up from his breakfast escapades. Aziraphale had cleaned Adam’s hands before letting him out of his high chair, but that left Crowley with the task of cleaning the toddler’s face and checking to make sure he hadn’t put any in his hair. Finding no food particles this time, Crowley started to gently brush through Adam’s loosely curled light brown hair. </p><p>Next was choosing clothes, and Crowley gave Adam a few choices to make and helped the toddler into his selections. Normally, Adam liked his going out hats but today was not one of those days. </p><p>As Crowley put on his sunglasses before the family went out the door, Adam pulled on the demon’s sleeve. Crowley looked down to Adam, who made circles with his fingers and put them up to his eyes. Crowley smirked and gave a small snap of his fingers, making a matching pair of glasses appear on Adam’s face. Adam touched the glasses to see if they were real and giggled in delight. </p><p>“Oh, I must get a picture of this. My two handsome devils,” Aziraphale cooed as he put down the picnic basket and pulled his mobile from his trouser pocket. </p><p>Crowley and Adam turned towards the camera and posed together, both with huge smiles on their faces. Crowley beckoned Aziraphale to come over as Crowley took out his own mobile and crouched down to Adam’s level. Aziraphale was positioned in the middle and the family took a selfie together before they resumed leaving the cottage for their trip.</p><p>As the Bentley roared down the country lane, Adam’s latest favorite song came on. We Will Rock You by Queen filled the car and so did the sounds of Adam’s participation. He kicked his feet against his chair and clapped his hands in time to the music and babbled his nonsense interpretation of the lyrics. Crowley glanced in the rear-view mirror, smiled, and gave Aziraphale’s captured hand a squeeze to get the angel’s attention. </p><p>Aziraphale loosened his death grip on Crowley’s hand, (Aziraphale still did not like how fast the demon drove), and looked over to Crowley. Crowley pointedly looked over his sunglasses up to the rear-view mirror to prompt Aziraphale to look back. Aziraphale braved turning in his seat to witness the mini concert happening in the backseat. Aziraphale visibly brightened as he watched the excited toddler continue to stomp and clap. </p><p>The shoreline was deserted because it was the middle of the week and what Crowley normally described as ‘too early.’ Aziraphale carried Adam from the Bentley onto the beach, selecting a level patch of sand between the rocks and the waves to set the toddler down. As Aziraphale straightened back to standing, he turned sightly to check on Crowley, whose sauntering steps made his navigation of the loose rocks very treacherous. </p><p>Aziraphale turned completely as he saw Crowley’s feet start to slide, and the demon’s face contort to a snarl as he realized the cruel punishment gravity was about to dole out on his style. Fortunately for Crowley, he had a guardian angel who closed the short distance left between them and swept the demon off his feet. Aziraphale was all smiles as he carried Crowley to the same place where Adam was still standing awestruck and placed the demon down on the soft sand. </p><p>Crowley, red from an embarrassed blush, murmured his thanks before giving Aziraphale a kiss on the cheek. Aziraphale stole a proper kiss before letting the demon regain his composure. The family looked out on the ocean together for a few moments before Adam was ready to explore this new place. Before Adam could get out of arm’s reach, Aziraphale had the toddler back in the air and Crowley was taking off the small sandals that Adam was wearing. Free from shoes and released from the angel’s grasp, Adam quickly made his way towards the water. Crowley snapped his fingers and the adults’ socks and shoes joined Adam’s on a nearby rock. Aziraphale also found that Crowley’s minor miracle had rolled his trouser legs up to his knee, the demon having worn a pair of his own gardening shorts. </p><p>“Ready, Angel?” Crowley drawled as he held out an inviting hand out to his husband.</p><p>“Of course, darling,” Aziraphale responded as he took the offered hand and they made their way towards Adam. </p><p>Adam was still cautious of the water, and he was chasing and being chased by the subtle waves as they lapped across the wet sand. When Adam noticed his parents approaching, he stopped in one place and smiled at them as he slowly started to sink into the sand as the water continued to wash over his feet. Adam looked down to his feet and then up to his parents, who stood next to him and let the same thing happen to them to show him that it was okay. </p><p>Adam pulled on both their hands to lift himself out of the sand and giggled at the sloppy sensation. No longer trapped, Adam went to where the sand was a bit drier and started to walk parallel to the water, occasionally dipping down to get his feet wet again. Aziraphale and Crowley walked arm in arm behind the enthusiastic toddler as he explored the beach from top to bottom.</p><p>As Adam got more brave about the water Crowley arched an eyebrow, asking, “Angel, do you know how to swim?”</p><p>“Of course, darling! I learned in Greece. Sappho insisted! And you?”</p><p>“Better in snake form. Sappho taught you too?”</p><p>Aziraphale laughed at the coincidence. “Maybe we should take Adam to Greece when we teach him how to swim?”</p><p>“Brilliant plan, Angel,” Crowley said before he kissed Aziraphale on the cheek. </p><p>Adam’s legs got tired, so the toddler plopped unceremoniously onto slightly damp sand and waited for his parents to catch up. As he waited, Adam occupied himself with grabbing clumps of sand and starting to make a messy pile next to him. </p><p>Aziraphale and Crowley crouched near Adam and used their own fingers to write messages in the sand. This intrigued Adam and he gave up on his wet sand pile to copy the shapes in the sand that his parents were writing. Adam concentrated hard to copy the shapes he saw and Aziraphale cooed in praise. Aziraphale read them to him as the toddler made his squiggles in the sand. They were simple phrases that carried the weight of many complex emotions, ‘I love you’ and ‘I am happy’. </p><p>When Adam returned to making his wet sand pile and started digging a large hole, Aziraphale and Crowley retreated to a few paces away where the sand was completely dry so they could sit. </p><p>“Why didn’t we do this sooner?” Crowley asked as he leaned against the angel as they watched their son play.</p><p>“Busy raising a baby, my dear,” Aziraphale responded as he watched Adam throw a handful of wet sand towards the water to watch it disintegrate in the air. </p><p>Crowley gave a small chuckle, “Right. Well, we should come more often.”</p><p>“I agree,” Aziraphale affirmed just as Adam came up with a big pile of wet sand in his scooped hands.</p><p>“Papa!” Adam said as he offered the pile to the angel.</p><p>“A present for me? Thank you, dearest!” Aziraphale said as he held out his hands to receive the pile.</p><p>Adam giggled as he plopped the pile into Aziraphale’s hands and watched in delight as Aziraphale did his best to form it into a ball. Crowley grabbed a bit of dry sand and added it to the uncooperative mass to help the angel out. With a bit more structure to compensate for the water content, Aziraphale had an easier time making a ball and offered it back to Adam. </p><p>Instead of taking the ball, Adam rushed back to his digging spot and brought back another wet sand pile in his hands, but this time looking to Crowley to fix it. Crowley added some dry sand to Adam’s pile and the parents watched as Adam worked on his puzzle of making his sand into a ball too. Now with two sand balls, Adam decided to roll them around in the dry sand until they crumbled. </p><p>Crowley had brought out his phone and was taking pictures. The sand knew better than to get in or on his phone. </p><p>Once Adam was done with sand for now, he wiped his hands on his clothes before he climbed into Aziraphale’s lap. The family sat together and looked out over the ocean until a tiny tummy rumbled for food. </p><p>Adam took a more direct route back to where they had started. He was on a mission for food. Once back at their shoes, Adam sat down on a pile of small rocks and fiddled with the different sized pebbles while Crowley went back to the Bentley to get the picnic that Aziraphale had packed that morning. </p><p>After demolishing the lunch the angel had prepared, Crowley gave Aziraphale his sunglasses to wear before he transformed into a snake so he could act as a pillow by Adam for their nap. Aziraphale, now in stylish sunglasses, settled against a rock with a book and outstretched one white wing over the napping duo to give them shade in the noon-day sun. </p><p>Adam was the first to wake up, squirming as he stretched which roused the snoozing serpent under him. Adam climbed into Aziraphale’s lap and pointed to the sunglasses on the angel’s face and to his own which he had surprisingly kept on during his nap. </p><p>“Yes we match now too. Do you want a picture?” Aziraphale asked as he put his book down to give Adam his full attention.</p><p>Adam nodded and waited as Aziraphale retrieved his phone so they could take a picture together. Aziraphale took several shots as Adam made more goofy faces in each frame. On the last frame, Crowley in human form and another set of sunglasses managed to squeeze in to photo bomb them. Aziraphale noticed and turned to receive an unexpected kiss from Crowley, who was taking another picture on his own phone. Adam photo bombed their kissing picture and they all laughed together before taking a proper matching family photo.</p><p>“Stay or home?” Aziraphale asked Adam after the last photo.</p><p>“Stay!” Adam exclaimed excitedly and waited for approval.</p><p>Crowley, still a bit sleepy nodded permission, saying, “Keep close. Daddy wants snuggles from Papa.”</p><p>Adam beamed, stood up, and walked off the picnic blanket to continue his explorations as Crowley put his head in the angel’s lap. Aziraphale had put his wings away and started to pet Crowley’s hair as he watched Adam return to chasing the water as the waves washed in and out. </p><p>“I wonder if Anathema and Warlock would like to come here with us,” Aziraphale mused as Crowley turned his head so the angel could play with more of his red curls.</p><p>“Could invite them out,” Crowley yawned as he adjusted the rest of his body.</p><p>“Maybe we could even invite Newton. I think he is rather spellbound by Anathema,” Aziraphale added but then paused, “Oh dear, that was a terrible turn of phrase.”</p><p>“Its called a pun, Angel. You’re rather good at them actually,” Crowley chuckled.</p><p>“At least you find them enjoyable, dear,” Aziraphale said as he took a moment to look down to Crowley who was very comfortable in his new position.</p><p>“Everything about you is enjoyable,” Crowley let the words rolled off his tongue easily. It was moments like this that Crowley could forget about Heaven and Hell.</p><p>“Likewise, my love,” Aziraphale stroked the demon’s cheek and then looked back up to check on Adam. </p><p>One short demon nap later, Adam was ready to follow the shoreline in the other direction. Adam came up to his parents and tried to pull them by their hands to have them follow him. Aziraphale and Crowley obliged and left their picnic blanket base to take a leisurely afternoon stroll arm in arm. </p><p>During the trip, Adam found a large pile of differently shaped rocks to climb on and used it as an impromptu jungle gym. When he was done with the rocks, Adam started back the way they had came, but instead of staying up on the sand away from the water, he wanted everything to do with the water. He jumped, splashed, kicked, and otherwise got himself soaked while playing in the small amount of surf that washed up on the shore during the walk back. </p><p>“I didn’t bring any towels. Did you, darling?” Aziraphale asked as they approached the picnic blanket.</p><p>“No, Angel,” Crowley answered as he picked up a corner of the blanket, “but this should work.”</p><p>Aziraphale nodded and then helped Adam out of his wet clothes, which were put into the picnic basket, as Crowley threatened all the sand granules off the blanket. Aziraphale used the blanket to wrap Adam up and then lifted the toddler to his hip to carry. </p><p>“Can you get the basket and shoes, Crowley?” Aziraphale asked as he adjusted Adam’s weight.</p><p>Crowley’s jaw was slightly dropped, he knew Aziraphale was strong but it wasn’t until he saw the angel perform such tasks like carrying their child effortlessly that he remembered in awe. “Uh...Um...Yeah!” Crowley managed to get his brain cells to compute as he picked up the items requested.</p><p>Aziraphale gave a small smug chuckle as he closed the distance to give Crowley a peck on the cheek. “Someone forgot about their piggyback ride in from the garden last week.”</p><p>Crowley eeked out something like a scoff, “Nngk, didn’t forgot.”</p><p>Aziraphale gave the demon a smile and started towards the Bentley as Adam gave a giggle of his own at his parents’ antics. Crowley could only shake his head as he followed behind the angel, all of them were hopelessly in love with each other.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Tantrums</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Heaven and Hell still have the parents on marching orders. Adam does not approve that each parent has to leave to go on assignment. Demonic protests are thrown in attempts to keep them home.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Crowley came down the stairs to find Aziraphale alone in the kitchen. Crowley looked to the clock on the kitchen wall to confirm the time and was still puzzled.</p>
<p>“Where’s Adam?” Crowley asked as he came closer to his angel.</p>
<p>“Still in bed. I went to wake him, but his face was red like he had been crying. I checked his diaper, but he was dry. When I spoke to him he moaned and rolled away from me. I didn’t know what to do, so I left him to sleep.” Aziraphale’s tone was even but quiet and distressed.</p>
<p>“Then we will let him sleep until breakfast is ready. Is there anything I can do to help?” Crowley offered as he leaned against the counter next to Aziraphale, but still not making any physical contact.</p>
<p>“You can get your coffee going, set the table, and umm...” Aziraphale trailed off as she tried to think of other things. </p>
<p>Crowley slowly closed the distance between them and placed a gentle kiss on Aziraphale’s cheek. Aziraphale’s tense shoulders settled a fraction and she turned worried blue eyes towards the demon.</p>
<p>“It will be alright, Angel. We will work through this together,” Crowley tried to reassure Aziraphale and got a faint smile in return. </p>
<p>Crowley took it as a step in the right direction and started on the tasks he had been given. With breakfast nearly ready, and Aziraphale packaging Adam’s snacks for the day, Crowley left the kitchen to try his hand at waking the toddler. Crowley came into the room and turned on the bedside nightlight, it wasn’t as harsh as the main room light even with the dimmer switch. Adam was curled tightly in a fetal position, still facing the wall. </p>
<p>“Morning, little hellspawn,” Crowley cooed before he sat down on the edge of the bed. </p>
<p>Adam whimpered in response but did not move. Crowley reached over and started to gently finger comb the toddler’s hair. “Mama told me you didn’t wet your diaper. We are so proud of you, you are really getting the hang of it.”</p>
<p>Adam relaxed a little at the praise, so Crowley continued to comb through the mess of curls. They stayed in silence for a minute until Adam decided to roll over onto his back. Crowley immediately gave Adam a kiss on the forehead, which cleared up the toddler’s headache, and stroked Adam’s cheek.</p>
<p>“There you are,” Crowley said in relief before continuing, “Adam, what happened?”</p>
<p>Adam freed his arms from underneath the blanket and stared up at Crowley as the toddler thought of his response. As Adam began to sign, Crowley thanked every star he helped create that the angel had had the brilliant idea of teaching the toddler sign language along with the verbal one. It took several moments for Crowley to decipher what Adam was trying to say, but once he understood he scooped up the toddler to take him to breakfast. Adam was on Crowley’s bony hip as the two came into the kitchen. Aziraphale was pouring another cup of tea and smiled when she saw the pair enter. </p>
<p>“Adam had a nightmare,” Crowley explained as Aziraphale closed the distance.</p>
<p>“Poor, dearest. I’m glad I made your favorite then. Are you ready for breakfast?”</p>
<p>The rest of the morning routine went smoothly. Adam had a bath, chose his outfit, and help pack a bag for a trip into London. As always, the family spent some time together in the flat above the resource center before it opened. Aziraphale and Crowley were in the floor helping Adam reconstruct the Tower of Babble. Adam had gotten to the point where he needed to stand to continue putting blocks on the stack, when Crowley absently checked his watch. The movement had caught Adam’s eye and the toddler looked over to the demon to see Crowley’s fallen expression.</p>
<p>“Dada?” Adam asked curiously. </p>
<p>Crowley sighed, “Daddy has to go bye-bye for a few days.”</p>
<p>There was a shift in the air as Adam suddenly stomped his foot and shrieked at the top of his lungs. The shriek made both parent’s wings manifest on the Earthly plane as a reaction to the demonic power that had been unknowingly been put into the shriek. Aziraphale was frozen in place and could only watch as Crowley tried to coo and talk down their toddler. Crowley lowered his wings when he found he could not put them away.</p>
<p>“Adam,” Crowley cooed, “little hellspawn.”</p>
<p>Crowley chanced a glance to Aziraphale, who did not know the demon called their son by that pet name, and saw the angel’s micro expression change to one of uncertainty rather than surprise. Crowley made himself focus back on the toddler tantrum in front of him. Adam was still yelling and stomping his feet, undeterred from Crowley’s cooing.</p>
<p>“I have to go to keep you and Mama safe. If I don’t, bad things will happen.” Crowley was doing his best to keep his tone even and soothing.</p>
<p>Adam’s yells broke into sobs as he knocked over his tower, still not focusing on either parent. Crowley continued, unsure if any of what he was saying was actually reaching the child.</p>
<p>“It’s not fair. I know I would rather stay here with both of you. But there is nothing we can do to change it. Maybe one day things will be different, but that is not today.”</p>
<p>Adam sank back into the floor and fumbled with his fingers as he tried to teach himself how to snap, tears streaming hot down his face. The angel and demon watched as the frustrated toddler continued to cry and clench his fists and fingers.</p>
<p>“What are you trying to do? Let us help you,” Crowley tried as he scooted closer to the toddler.</p>
<p>“I don’t think we can, darling,” Aziraphale’s tone was deadpan as the angel figured out what Adam was trying to do and failing.</p>
<p>“Angel?” Crowley asked as he looked up to Aziraphale, whose micro expressions were going through the Rolodex of emotions.</p>
<p>“Oh Adam dearest! If it were that easy, we would have done that long ago,” Aziraphale cooed, fighting back her own tears as she watched the toddler continue to struggle.</p>
<p>This sent Adam into a further spiral as he gave up and laid belly down on the floor. The screaming resumed as Adam kicked his feet and hammered his fists on the living room rug. Aziraphale managed to pull herself out of the floor and onto the nearby couch but her wings still would not fold out of the Earthly plane. Aziraphale silently motioned for Crowley to join her and the demon tiptoed around Adam and sat next to the angel, close but not touching. </p>
<p>“What was he trying to do?” Crowley asked quietly, still unsure what Adam had been doing prior to his current state in the floor.</p>
<p>“To perform a miracle so you wouldn’t have to leave!” Aziraphale’s tone was desperate despite her best effort to stay calm. “We’ve been to frivolous about using them around him. Now he doesn’t understand why he can’t do them to get what he wants.”</p>
<p>“Oh Angel,” Crowley breathed as he looked from Aziraphale to the prone toddler in the floor, who had started to run out of breath and had degraded from shrieks to loud moans and whimpers. </p>
<p>“What do we do?” Aziraphale asked as she stared uncertainly at Adam as well.</p>
<p>“I don’t know,” Crowley confessed as he watched Adam run out of steam for kicking.</p>
<p>“Adam,” Aziraphale cooed, “Adam, you have to keep Mama safe while Daddy is away. That’s a big job for our boy, but we know you can do it.”</p>
<p>The angel’s words seemed to break a small hole in the tantrum, and the still crying Adam rolled over on his side to look where the voice had come from, to find both parents on the couch together.</p>
<p>Aziraphale gave him a relieved smile as she continued to comfort Adam with words. “There’s our brave boy. Come on up and give Daddy a proper goodbye.”</p>
<p>Aziraphale patted the small space between her and Crowley and waited for the toddler’s reaction. Adam sniffed and worked to sit up, and the tension in the air lessened. Both the angel and demon felt the shift and they could finally put their wings away as Adam stood and took a few shaky steps towards the couch. Adam climbed into the space between his parents and was soon cocooned by both their loving arms. Crowley was the first to pull away but not before giving Adam kisses all over his face and a focused kiss on Aziraphale’s lips. </p>
<p>“My angels. I miss both of you already,” Crowley said as he peeled himself out of the couch. </p>
<p>Adam and Aziraphale waved goodbye from the couch as Crowley left the flat. After the door closed, Aziraphale scooped up Adam and they went to a nearby window to watch Crowley climb into the Bentley and zoom away from the curb.</p>
<p>Adam hiccuped and Aziraphale hummed in agreement. “I agree a cup of cocoa sounds lovely.”</p>
<p>=====</p>
<p>The rest of the day went as it normally did at the resource center, Adam just wanted Aziraphale’s attention more than normal. Everyone at the center was understanding, having a loved one leave for an extended amount of time was hard for anyone. That night as Aziraphale and Adam went through their bedtime routine, Adam’s bedtime story was replaced with a phone call from Daddy. Aziraphale and Adam were curled on the adults’ bed together so they could share the phone.</p>
<p>“Hello Adam. Were you a good boy for your Mama today?” Crowley’s voice came through on speaker phone mode on Aziraphale’s mobile.</p>
<p>Aziraphale nodded silently and Adam started talking, telling Crowley all about his day in his broken speech pattern. Aziraphale supplemented and helped with words as Adam stumbled, but she let the toddler give his own version of the day’s events. Adam yawned and listened as Crowley told his tale of what he had done that day. When Adam gave a loud dramatic yawn and Crowley took that as his cue to finish the phone call.</p>
<p>“Sleep well, little hellspawn…Sorry Angel, habit,” Crowley apologized in the same breath.</p>
<p>“Just like how you call me angel. I think it is cute,” Aziraphale reassured her demon. “Good night, my love. Sleep well.”</p>
<p>“Goodnight, Aziraphale. I love you,” Crowley replied with a yawn and hung up the phone.</p>
<p>Adam had snuggled in against Aziraphale’s side and gave the angel puppy dog eyes when she tried to rouse him enough to get him to move. Aziraphale sighed and gave in, only making the toddler move enough to get the blanket over him. Aziraphale leaned down and gave Adam a kiss on the forehead and whispered a small blessing. </p>
<p>“Dream of what you like best, dearest. You deserve it.”</p>
<p>======================</p>
<p>“Angel, you don’t have to cook like you are feeding your heavenly platoon every time you go out on assignment,” Crowley said as he opened the fridge to look. They were still at the cottage, and the demon knew the refrigerator in his flat and the flat above the resource center were just as packed with neatly labeled containers. </p>
<p>“I just want both of you to be prepared. Adam’s a growing boy! And because you have the Bentley, I never know where you are going to end up at any given time,” Aziraphale prattled on, his nerves starting to show through. </p>
<p>Crowley just shook his head at the angel and gave him a peck on the cheek. “You’re being ridiculous.”</p>
<p>Adam came back to the kitchen after successfully dressing himself, and the family left the cottage to commute into London. Adam was suspicious when they spent the morning in Saint James’ Park instead of going to the resource center, but he pushed it aside as he terrorized the ducks. </p>
<p>After the park, the family went to Crowley’s Mayfair flat. The door to the flat closed, and Aziraphale made no motion to take off his coat and get comfortable, which made Adam stop his trail towards the plant room. Adam turned and looked to his Papa, who had crouched down to be closer to his height level. </p>
<p>“It’s Papa’s turn Adam,” Aziraphale cooed and held his arms outstretched.</p>
<p>“No! Papa no go!” Adam shrieked as he crossed his arms stood still like a statue. This shriek did not force their wings out onto the Earthly plane, but there was still a shudder of demonic power behind the words.</p>
<p>“Adam, I need you to keep your Daddy company. He gets lonely without us.”</p>
<p>“Daddy sad! Papa no go!” Adam was trying to use logic this time instead of brute demonic force.</p>
<p>“Daddy will be even sadder if we don’t let Papa go now.” Crowley crouched next to Adam and explained gently, “They will take Papa away forever.”</p>
<p>Adam started to cry. It always felt like forever when either parent left. Adam did not know who ‘they’ were, but he decided ‘they’ were bad because they took his parents away from him every month. </p>
<p>“I know it’s frustrating. But this is why I had you help me pick people to keep the center open while I am away. When I get back, we will spend the whole next week together at the cottage,” Aziraphale tried to bargain with the only thing he had.</p>
<p>Adam sniffled and asked, “Promise?” </p>
<p>“Promise.” Aziraphale motioned for Adam to come give him a hug. </p>
<p>Adam gave one last huff of protest before he moped over to his angel parent to be engulfed in a hug full of love. Adam started to feel a little less empty and hugged Aziraphale back. Aziraphale pulled back and covered Adam’s face in kisses, which made the toddler giggle. </p>
<p>“Be good for your Daddy. Cause chaos for everyone else. Okay, dearest?” Aziraphale encouraged as he stood. </p>
<p>“Okay Papa,” Adam affirmed as he latched onto the angel’s leg, knowing his Daddy would need to say goodbye too before his Papa would actually leave.</p>
<p>Crowley sauntered over and got a tight hug that released all the tension the angel had been holding onto about Adam’s second tantrum. The couple kissed then Crowley had to coax Adam off Aziraphale’s leg.</p>
<p>“Come on, little hellspawn, let’s go show the plants how we feel.” Crowley stepped away from Aziraphale and looked down to Adam.</p>
<p>Adam pouted but let go and latched onto Crowley’s leg instead. Crowley petted Adam’s messy hair with one hand and waved goodbye with the other. </p>
<p>“We love you. Travel safely, Angel,” Crowley bid as Adam started to wave goodbye as well.</p>
<p>“I love you both. If I can, I will call tonight,” Aziraphale said before he turned to exit the flat. </p>
<p>Crowley then had to drag the leg that Adam was still attached to, which was quite fun for Adam and it lifted his spirits a little. Once in the plant room, Adam helped mist and let out all his shrieks he had wanted to voice earlier. As they exited the plant room together, Adam tried to imitate Crowley’s saunter, which caused the toddler to end up in the floor. As Adam tried again, it took Crowley a moment to realize what he was doing. Crowley slowed down his walk and attempted to help Adam dissect the walk that Crowley had developed over millennia. Crowley could tell Adam was getting frustrated the more they practiced, so Crowley ended the walking session.</p>
<p>“We can practice some more later, and we’ll show Papa when he gets back,” Crowley said, soothing Adam’s on-edge nerves.</p>
<p>Adam sniffled, nodded, and got back up to walk normally. Crowley held out his hand and Adam took it in a tight grasp as they made their way towards the living room to get a second start on their day. </p>
<p>======</p>
<p>Crowley secreted a gift for Adam under the pillow he was currently leaned against as Adam washed his hands and face for the night. Crowley was texting Aziraphale to make sure the angel was available as Adam crawled up on the big bed to be with Daddy. Unlike Aziraphale, Crowley liked having Adam sleep with him, no matter the occasion. Adam finally settled in under the covers with Crowley and the demon called the angel on the other side of the world.</p>
<p>“Hello my loves! How did your day go?” Aziraphale’s tone was bright over the speakerphone.</p>
<p>Adam started on his recount of the day and Crowley had to remind the toddler to keep the secret for the surprise they had actually spent a bulk of the day practicing.</p>
<p>“It sounds like you stayed busy today. Are you feeling tired?” Aziraphale asked, because Adam had yet to yawn.</p>
<p>“Nuh-uh. Nap long!” Adam enthused as he even bounced a little to prove his point even though Aziraphale could not see him.</p>
<p>“Crowley,” Aziraphale admonished tenderly.</p>
<p>“I have a story I can tell. Adam do you want Papa to hear the story too?” Crowley spoke apologetically, and couldn’t help the embarrassed blush on his face. </p>
<p>“Yes!” Adam bounced more as he squirmed closer to Crowley.</p>
<p>“I met up with your Papa once, he was in a crowd of onlookers. He didn’t know I was going to be there and was surprised when I tapped him on the shoulder. A man had built a really big boat and was turning it into a zoo.”</p>
<p>“Zoo!” Adam latched onto the word, it was one of his favorite places to go with Anathema and Warlock.</p>
<p>Crowley chuckled and continued, “Your Papa told me the zoo was about to float and everything would look like the ocean. Remember the beach?”</p>
<p>“Water!” Adam was definitely excited, it wasn’t often that Crowley was the one telling stories not from a book and Adam was hanging on every word.</p>
<p>“Well one of the animals got away, and I yelled at the son of the shipbuilder. ‘Oi Shem! One of the unicorns is making a run for it!’ The one that ran away didn’t get caught, and I hadn’t given it a second thought. But what I didn’t realize was how lonely the two unicorns would be when they were apart.”</p>
<p>Aziraphale had to cut in and expose a secret he had kept hidden, “Fortunately, the unicorns had an angel on their side, and he transported both of them to Ireland for safe keeping.”</p>
<p>“You what?!?!” Crowley sputtered and shot upright, holding the phone at arm’s length. </p>
<p>“Sorry, darling, it sounded like you were making a point, and I just ruined it,” Aziraphale sighed at his own impulsiveness. </p>
<p>Adam giggled at the flabbergasted Crowley, and the demon had to take a few moments to collect himself.</p>
<p>Aziraphale was the one to fill the silence, “Really, dear. How do you think the legend of the unicorn lasted this long in human history?”</p>
<p>“But I haven’t seen another unicorn since that day!” Crowley protested.</p>
<p>“How many times did you go to Ireland other than to make red hair popular? And you didn’t know, so you didn’t go looking, now did you?” Aziraphale reasoned, smug tone firmly in place.</p>
<p>“You did a blessing today, and that is why I’m getting the bastard kickback?” Crowley quipped. </p>
<p>“Possibly. Get back to the story, Crowley. I’m sure we are losing Adam’s interest,” Aziraphale tried to get the demon to focus.</p>
<p>Adam didn’t understand what his parents were talking about but had relaxed against the pillows and was focusing on listening to their voices as he absently rubbed his hands on the soft comforter. Crowley retrieved the gift behind the pillow before he leaned back against it, and put it in Adam’s view.</p>
<p>“Shem!” Adam exclaimed as he reached for the stuffed unicorn, the body was all white and so was its horn, while the mane and tail were striped with the rainbow. </p>
<p>Aziraphale chuckled as Crowley explained what he had just given Adam, who had the toy in a death-grip hug. Crowley snapped a photo and sent it to Aziraphale so he could witness the scene. </p>
<p>“You really are thoughtful, Crowley. Is Adam still wide awake?” Aziraphale asked after saving the photo to his mobile.</p>
<p>“Night night time?” Crowley asked Adam, who was admiring the unicorn.</p>
<p>“Story!” Adam exclaimed as he snuggled in, now with Shem squished in his arms and against Crowley’s side.</p>
<p>“Your turn, Angel, that’s all I’ve got,” Crowley said, throwing Aziraphale into the spotlight.</p>
<p>Aziraphale gave another chuckle as he puzzled over what story to tell. The angel settled on spinning his journey and deeds of the day into a thrilling tale. By the time Aziraphale got to the end, Adam had dozed off and a light sprinkle had started outside.</p>
<p>“He’s asleep. He really missed you today,” Crowley whispered as he took the phone off speaker.</p>
<p>“I missed you both. Maybe you should be Mummy tomorrow since that was the main form we were in when he was a baby. It seemed to help when you were gone,” Aziraphale suggested.</p>
<p>“I’ll see what he thinks in the morning. I love you, Angel.” Crowley yawned as he sunk lower into the covers.</p>
<p>“I love you too, Crowley. Sleep well,” Aziraphale said warmly before he hung up the phone.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hello AO3 family!  I apologize for the delay in posts. Life on my side of the screen went a bit pear shaped. Although I do like pears, it was not conducive to writing. </p>
<p>I hope you enjoyed this installment of toddler life for the ineffable family! I imagine Adam anywhere between ages one through four, and left it vague in these chapters on purpose. If I have any more ideas for this time span I will post them to this as another chapter. I would love to hear your ideas for this time period!</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hello AO3 family!  I apologize for the delay in posts. Life on my side of the screen went a bit pear shaped. Although I do like pears, it was not conducive to writing. </p><p>I hope you enjoyed this installment of toddler life for the ineffable family! I imagine Adam anywhere between ages one through four, and left it vague in these chapters on purpose. If I have any more ideas for this time span I will post them to this as another chapter. I would love to hear your ideas for this time period!</p></blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>